Couples Counseling

In this article I will clarify the difference between Couples Counselling and Relationship Counseling and then move onto schools of Couples Counseling and the expectations one should have of a couples counselor. Relationship Counseling can be summarized as a mediator assisting all parties in a relationship in becoming cognizant of behavior patterns that are negatively impacting the relationship. Once identified the patterns are examined in detail to discover the stress point that underlies the negative pattern. Once located, the stress point is addressed in more fruitful ways and new techniques for managing the stress are developed. While couples do enter into Relationship Counseling, others relationships (families, neighbors, business partners, etc.) do as well. Learn how to solve your marriage crisis and problems and for all with this guide: Save My Marriage Today

Couples Counseling And Relationship Counselling

Couples Counseling has superficial similarities to Relationship Counseling, but the depth of Couples Counseling compared to Relationship Counseling is best appreciated by comparing the time commitments involved. Couples Counseling, is seldom begun without a commitment to a three month minimum, or 13 sessions; some therapist insist on a 6 month commitment. Once in therapy, some couples remain so for years. Relationship Counseling on the other hand can show appreciable results in a single session and rarely continues for more than several sessions.

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There is an abbreviated form of couple counseling. Focused therapy can be attempted when a specific problem has impacted the couple from outside the relationship (death, disability, retirement, etc.). If the relationship is otherwise healthy, this can be attempted, but it must be accepted that focused couple therapy may evolve into couples therapy.

Having distinguished between relationship and couple counseling, what can one expect in couple therapy? It depends on the therapist and the therapeutic school that the therapist employs. When looking for a couples councilor, you cannot make an informed decision if you do not know what therapeutic school will be used. All Couples Counseling primarily focuses on the communication process between the parties, but there are any number of ways this process can be addressed.

The role of the couples therapist or councilor is, first and foremost, to provide a safe environment for both parties to reveal their feelings. This aspect alone can become controversial. An example is “active listening.” This therapeutic school permitted couples to engage uninhibited criticism of the other under the guise of safe communications. Studies on the long term efficacy of “active listening” have revealed that after a point active listening is actively detrimental to a relationship.

The goals of couples therapy are achieved by a 4-step process that is similar to the process by which individuals resolve internal conflicts in therapy. Step 1: recognize negative behavior patterns. Step 2: expose the belief system that underlies the behavior. Step 3: deconstruct the belief system. Step 4: reorganize the emotional response.

The difference between individual therapy and couples therapy is that in couples therapy the process is worked through together. In Step 1, the negative behavior patterns are identified not by the individual, but by the individual’s partner. Note that active addictions and underlying sociopathologies can prevent couples counselling from working.

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Sabrina Summerfield

www.Stop-Divorce-Save-My-Marriage.com

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